How to find your style in 10 steps

by Sylvia

How to find you style in clothing - style icon Jackie Kennedy Onassis

In my previous article specifically on style, How to define Style, I made an attempt at defining what style is. In this article let’s take a look at some of the things you can do to find your own personal style.

One of the quotes that defined style the best for me was this one from Gore Vidal: “Style is knowing who you are, what you want to say, and not giving a damn.”

Style is as much about knowing about yourself as well as knowing what you want to portray. If you are assured of this knowledge, other people’s opinions don’t really matter.

How to find that confidence in yourself and your style

1. Understand your body

Knowledge is power. So the first thing you need to understand is what kind of body you have and what works for you. If you have a good understanding of your body shape and your strengths and weaknesses, you can buy the right clothes to either accentuate or camouflage them. At we work with 5 horizontal body types:

You can identify your body type by going to this page and then follow the guidelines for your specific body type.

You may also like to identify your vertical body type.

Once you have discovered that, you can start thinking about the desired silhouette you want to create and create a balanced outfit.

2. Understand your personality

Write down some words that describe your personality. How would you currently describe it? Do you feel that your style reflects your personality?

Have a look at various different styles. Which do appeal to you most?

3. Which colors inspire you?

Colours can also have a huge effect on your style and how you feel. Understand how certain colours make you feel. You may like to read my article on the psychology of color.

If you don’t use much color in your current style, you may start to experiment a bit by adding bits of colors through accessories and see how these make you feel.

4. Keep a scrapbook or pin the styles that inspire you

Whenever you see others wearing clothes you admire or like, try to get a picture and paste it in a note or scrapbook or pin it on Pinterest. After a while, you will see a pattern developing of the kind of styles that you like. Take note of that and remind yourself about this style before going for the latest fashionable trend.

5. Be critical of your current wardrobe

Be honest. Which garments in your closet do you REALLY like. How many of the garments have you not worn for a long time. How many were ‘mistakes’. Again, write down what didn’t work. Which clothes make you HAPPY? Then donate or swap any items that you know don’t really work for you. They may be great pieces, but if they don’t suit YOU or your body type or create the silhouette you are after, you will not look stylish in them.  Have a look at my wardrobe editing series and create a wardrobe that you love!

6. Make sure that every item you buy FITS you

I’m sure this happened to you. You see an absolutely wonderful piece of clothing at a rock bottom price. It fits your body, style personality and creates a silhouette you like. You try it on, but it’s just a little bit too short or too tight. You buy it anyway because the piece is so lovely and it’s cheap. This is a big mistake. Any clothing that does not fit you properly will never look good on you. So please beware of sales and only buy new clothes when you really adore them and they fit you properly (or that you can easily alter to fit you).

7. Keep a note book or diary of your outfits or take pictures

You may already pin images or make a scrapbook of clothes that inspire you, but also try to really understand which clothes you actually wear make you feel GREAT!

If you felt wonderful on any particular day wearing a certain outfit, write it down. Or better even, take a picture. I have found that taking pictures of myself is a great help in recognising which outfits worked and looked good and which ones didn’t. This will help you identify your style and prevent you from making buying mistakes.

8. Try to identify the components of your style and only follow the latest trends when they fit your style

True style defies fashion trends. Although it is nice to add some trendy pieces each season, you should only go for the trends that suit you. Try to wait for a trend that suits you and then buy several pieces.

9. Make sure your wardrobe contains all the necessary basics for your style

If through all of the above you got a clearer sense of what you like and what suits you, you need to determine if you have the basic essentials necessary for your particular style.

These basics will be different for all of you. Go trhough your inspiration book and determine the absolutely necessary essentials for your style. Here is also what some style experts have to say about your wardrobe essentials.

10. Make your style extra special with the right statement pieces and accessories

Once you have covered the basics of your style, look for some wonderful statement pieces that are truly unique for you. Try to be creative and mix both high and low end brands together. Create something unique!

Accessories are easier to change and it’s also easier to be very creative with them. Invest in a good pair of shoes and choose the perfect hand bag for your style. If you understand your style well, it may not be necessary at all to have many shoes or handbags. Rather, you could focus on getting the perfect ones. One of these accessories may become part of your signature style. Something that uniquely defines you.

Let me know if these tips work you for you!

P.S. I have made the process of finding your style a whole lot easier for you now!  In my special style course 21 Steps to a More Stylish You  I created a total of 21 steps to discover your try unique style and learn how to dress better and shop smarter. In 21 days (or longer if you wish as the course is self-paced) you will understand so much more about your own body, personality, the golden ratio and silhouette and will know what you need to do to take your style to the next level. Read the reviews and get instant access!

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{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }


Very useful post! Its great you’ve decided to give tips how to create personal style!

Have a lovey day!


Darien Keane

Thank you so much for these tips. I just got a new job after being a stay at home mom and I have been stressing about what to wear. You have taken the edge off of my prep and I am so thankful. I realized I have a few things that work, so I don’t have to start over, and now I know what I need. Thank you!



Great to hear that these tips were helpful to you Darien. Wishing you good luck with your new job and hope to connect with you again on the site!



Hi Sylvia!

I know this is a long ago post, but I’m having fun flipping through the archives.

I found style after I learned to paint. I started to understand color theory and suddenly I could mix and match my wardrobe, where before I could never understand how to do it. It’s a way of being a little bit artistic every morning. One of the most important things I do is I arrange my clothes by color so my (very small) closet is a rainbow. It helps me mix and match and also to know where I have a lot of clothes of a color (um, no more orange) or nothing in a color.



Great that you are browsing old articles Lisa. It’s good that they are not forgotten!
Yes, I do the same thing. As you say, it’s a great way to know which colors are still lacking!


Muriel Philips

Thank you for such a lovely blog. All the tips you’ve shared on finding your own style are particularly helpful – you’ve spurred me into action!

Have a lovely day
From Durban, South Africa.



Excellent. Good luck Muriel!



Hello Sylvia. I am an older woman, but my fashion sense seems to go back to the 1970. (not hippy styles :) Do you think is is all right for a woman of my age to wear long shirts and dresses? I love jeans and unusual shirts with sandals. I’d even wear sandals with my long skirts. This is the style I have loved for years. Am I too old for this??? Thank you for listening.



No I don’t think so. I think it’s important to stay true to your style. The most important thing is to OWN the look and wear it with confidence!



Hi Sylvia,

I have been following your tips and I couldn’t believe it when recently on holiday another lady came up to me and said that she and her husband loved my style and the way I dressed. I was so flattered. I wonder if this happens often to other women of our age?
Thank you so much.



Wonderful to hear. I think other people can appreciate great style at any age!


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