How to find your style in 10 steps

by Sylvia

How to find you style in clothing - style icon Jackie Kennedy Onassis

In my previous article specifically on style, How to define Style, I made an attempt at defining what style is. In this article let’s take a look at some of the things you can do to find your own personal style.

One of the quotes that defined style the best for me was this one from Gore Vidal: “Style is knowing who you are, what you want to say, and not giving a damn.”

Style is as much about knowing about yourself as well as knowing what you want to portray. If you are assured of this knowledge, other people’s opinions don’t really matter.

How to find that confidence in yourself and your style

1. Understand your body

Knowledge is power. So the first thing you need to understand is what kind of body you have and what works for you. If you have a good understanding of your body shape and your strengths and weaknesses, you can buy the right clothes to either accentuate or camouflage them.

2. Keep a note book or diary or take pictures

If you felt great on any particular day wearing a certain outfit, write it down. Or better even, take a picture. I have found that taking pictures of myself is a great help in recognising which outfits worked and looked good and which ones didn’t.

3. Understand your personality and colours

Colours can also have a huge effect on your style and how you feel. Understand how certain colours make you feel. You can consider doing a color analysis with an image consultant or you can do a style course. You can also do exercizes like the style statement to understand your style personality.

4. Keep a scrapbook or pin the styles that inspire you

Whenever you see others wearing clothes you admire or like, try to get a picture and paste it in a note or scrapbook or pin it on Pinterest. After a while, you will see a pattern developing of the kind of styles that you like. Take note of that and remind yourself about this style before going for the latest fashionable trend.

5. Be critical of your current wardrobe

Be honest. Which garments in your closet do you REALLY like. How many of the garments have you not worn for a long time. How many were ‘mistakes’. Again, write down what didn’t work. Which clothes make you HAPPY? Then throw away or swap any items that you know don’t really look good on you. They may be great pieces, but if they don’t suit YOU or your body type, you will not look stylish in them.  Have a look at my wardrobe editing series and create a wardrobe that you love!

6. Make sure that every item you buy FITS you

I’m sure this happened to you. You see an absolutely wonderful piece of clothing at a rock bottom price. You try it on, but it’s just a little bit too short or too tight. You buy it anyway because the piece is so lovely and it’s cheap. This is a big mistake. Any clothing that does not fit you properly will never look good on you. So please beware of sales and only buy new clothes when you really adore them and they fit you properly (or that you can easily alter to fit you).

7. Only follow the latest trends when they fit your style or your body type

True style defies fashion trends. Although it is nice to add some trendy pieces each season, you should only go for the trends that suit you. Try to wait for a trend that suits you and then buy several pieces.

8. Make sure your wardrobe contains all the necessary basics for your style

If through all of the above you got a clearer sense of what you like and what suits you, you need to determine if you have the basic essentials necessary for your particular style.

These basics will be different for all of you. Go trhough your inspiration book and determine the absolutely necessary essentials for your style. Here is also what some style experts have to say about your wardrobe essentials.

9. Add your own special statement pieces

Once you have covered the basics of your style, look for some wonderful statement pieces that are truly unique for you. Try to be creative and mix both high and low end brands together. Create something unique!

10. Make your style extra special with the right accessories

Accessories are easier to change and it’s also easier to be very creative with them. Invest in a good pair of shoes and choose the perfect hand bag for your style. If you understand your style well, it may not be necessary at all to have many shoes or handbags. Rather, you could focus on getting the perfect ones. One of these accessories may become part of your signature style. Something that uniquely defines you.

Let me know if these tips work you for you!

P.S. I have made the process of finding your style a whole lot easier for you now! I created the 21 Steps to a More Stylish You course. In 21 days (or longer if you wish) you will understand so much more about your own body, personality, style and will know what you need to do to take it to the next level. Read the reviews and get instant access!

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{ 15 comments… read them below or add one }


I agree with your list, particularly your point about FIT. Clothes muuuust fit and suit you to perfection.

Darling I found your link in an IFB chat and I’m your 2nd bloglovin follower. Trust you will check mine out!




Sure I will check you out! Really love your drawings. You have a very Dutch name by the way. Are you Dutch? Yes, I know I still need to ‘work’ on my bloglovin followers, but I’m not sure if a lot of my target audience is using it.. Thanks for following. I’ve followed you back, as well as your tumblr blog. My tumblr can be found at:



Hello, how are you doing?

Lovely blog!
I saw you on IFB community, so I am following you on BlogLovin and your facebook page.
Feel free to check it out my blog, and let me know hwat you think.

Lots of love from Brazil




Hi Denis, thanks for stepping by and following. You have a very interesting website. Beautiful images!



Very useful post! Its great you’ve decided to give tips how to create personal style!

Have a lovey day!


Darien Keane

Thank you so much for these tips. I just got a new job after being a stay at home mom and I have been stressing about what to wear. You have taken the edge off of my prep and I am so thankful. I realized I have a few things that work, so I don’t have to start over, and now I know what I need. Thank you!



Great to hear that these tips were helpful to you Darien. Wishing you good luck with your new job and hope to connect with you again on the site!



I struggle with something…. My style over the past 5 yrs has changed dramtaically especially due to my life changes (from office girl to working from home mother of 2 kids)

I now find myself most often in shorts/tshirt and flip flops…

I like it but then I will go out and see some fancy dressed women and wish I had made more of an effort…

Which is the way to go? Accept who I am now, or try some changes to feel different?

Thanks for advice



Hi Christina, Thank you for your question. I find this such an important topic that I moved your question to my style forum, where I can into more depth into replying and other forum members can give their feedback as well. So please go to for my reply.



Hi Sylvia!

I know this is a long ago post, but I’m having fun flipping through the archives.

I found style after I learned to paint. I started to understand color theory and suddenly I could mix and match my wardrobe, where before I could never understand how to do it. It’s a way of being a little bit artistic every morning. One of the most important things I do is I arrange my clothes by color so my (very small) closet is a rainbow. It helps me mix and match and also to know where I have a lot of clothes of a color (um, no more orange) or nothing in a color.



Great that you are browsing old articles Lisa. It’s good that they are not forgotten!
Yes, I do the same thing. As you say, it’s a great way to know which colors are still lacking!


Muriel Philips

Thank you for such a lovely blog. All the tips you’ve shared on finding your own style are particularly helpful – you’ve spurred me into action!

Have a lovely day
From Durban, South Africa.



Excellent. Good luck Muriel!



Hello Sylvia. I am an older woman, but my fashion sense seems to go back to the 1970. (not hippy styles :) Do you think is is all right for a woman of my age to wear long shirts and dresses? I love jeans and unusual shirts with sandals. I’d even wear sandals with my long skirts. This is the style I have loved for years. Am I too old for this??? Thank you for listening.



No I don’t think so. I think it’s important to stay true to your style. The most important thing is to OWN the look and wear it with confidence!


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