How to dress after 40 and look hip?

by Sylvia

How to dress after 40

Of course you can dress any which way you like, but if you don’t want to look like you are sixteen, like you are trying too hard to stay young or appear older than you are, you may like some guidelines as to how to dress after 40.

Here are just some of the things women over 40 need to be aware of.

Please note that these are just GENERAL guidelines. They certainly don’t apply to everyone.

Still, I also believe in dressing to your strengths and taking your body into account so if you like to have some guidelines on how to dress after 40, then you can find them below.

How to dress after 40 – What are some of the things you should avoid?

1. Don’t buy clothes that do not flatter you, even if it’s the trends this season.

For this it’s important to know your body type, which I will discuss in upcoming posts.

2. Try not to be too matchy-matchy or too polished.

It’s nice to mix things up and be a bit more playful. A 2 piece suit will quickly look old. Better to mix that jacket with another skirt or pants and look effortlessly chic.

3.  Avoid buying fabrics that are too cheap as they are usually not flattering or will not last. 

You can see some characteristics of fabrics here. Best to buy only the clothes that you love and that have a chance of lasting.

4. Don’t mix a tight skirt or pants with a tight top.

Aim to have either a tight skirt with a loser top or vice versa.

See also my tips on how to wear leggings over 40.

5. Clothes that you need to be more careful with:

What are some of the things you should do more of?

1. Know your style! Nothing is more important than dressing in a way that pleases and represents you. If you know your style and understand your body you can break any of the rules or add items from the ‘don’t list’ as you please. My find your style challenge will help with that.

2. Determine the wardrobe essentials that are unique to your style.

3. Have more lasting high quality items in your wardrobe. These vary for each style personality but some important classics are:

  • A white button down shirt.
  • A long coat (could be a trench coat).
  • A beautiful dress that fits you perfectly. Don’t automatically go for a little black dress. Many women over 40 will actually look better (and slimmer) in a colorful dress. – you may like to get a dress with sleeves
  • Well fitted long pants.
  • A well fitted blazer.
  • A good pair of dark denim jeans that fit you well. Boot cut or straight leg is usually the most flattering.

4. Mix and match designer items with non-designer ones.

5. Take a good critical look at yourself before you go out and see if you look too overdone. The aim is to look effortlessly chic so just evaluate and if necessary you may have to add on something a bit more casual.

6. keep current with the fashion trends and make sure you have a few current items in your wardrobe. Only pick those trends that work for you! If you want to know about the latest trends you can subscribe to my newsletter and receive a free style guide!

7. Wear skirts that are just above or on top of the knee which is the best skirt length for women over 40. Try not to go too far over the knee as this is not flattering for your calves and your overall look will be older.  You will look the sexiest and chicest if the skirt is not too wide and not too long. Petite women may want to go a bit shorter with their skirt lengths. For more info see my article on the perfect skirt length for women over 40.

8. Play with accessories like belts, jewelry and hats. They can make a real difference to your outfit.

9. If you want to hide some of the bulges, then shapewear definitely helps. If you don’t like shapewear, then learning how to skilfully hide with the right clothes will be preferable, like these tips in my article on how to hide your belly.

10. Make sure you wear a good bra and invisible undergarments. More info in my article on how to find the perfect bra.

11. Wear hip and current shoes. These add an instant young and hip vibe to your outfits. Make sure to choose shoes that you are able to walk in. Mid high heels can look fabulous. If you need more support I have a great list of arch support shoes.

I want to emphasise again that these tips are not set in stone and it’s up to you to decide what works best for you. But if you want to look young and hip, then these ‘rules’ can certainly help. The more you understand your body and your style, the more you can break these rules as you please.

For even more tips, see also this related article:  How to dress over 40 – my top ten tips

Would you like a fun challenge where you can get clearer on your style and learn how to dress for your body type and personality? You may like to join my free Find Your Style challenge!


If you have any further tips then I would love to hear them!



{ 101 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Tracy (The Wardrobe Wanderer)

some great tips here! My fear when dressing is that I’ll look like I’m trying too hard, or trying to look younger than I am. I think it looks terrible when someone my age or older is wearing, let’s say, really tight ripped up jeans and a top with a huge word boldly splashed across its front, and wearing it off of one shoulder….super high stilletos, gaudy jewelry and overdone makeup. It just looks pathetic, unfortunately. Luckily for me, that sort of look was never my style, even when I was a teen, so it’s not hard to avoid it. I still think about it though when I’m shopping or dressing….’is this age appropriate for me?’ I really want to remain playful and stylish, but I don’t grab just anything that catches my eye anymore.


2 Sylvia

Thanks Tracy. I think you can still look very hip and be very creative with your clothes over 40. But as you say there are some things that you can better leave to the younger generation…


3 louise

I agree with Tracey I used to think when I was younger, when my older friends used to say I don’t wear things like that anymore ive already dressed like a teenager I am not an an age to do it again and it looks ridiculous. I would respond by laughing at them and saying who the hell cares. But now I am 41 I can see what they meant. And yes it does take me ages to find something to wear no because of not being able to just grab anything. Embrace your classiness , I still wear a leather jacket but I pair it with a blanket scarf and just little touches like that.


4 LaNay

Chillout and pick something that you love. Then couple it with one of the great tips on this sight. Being pathetic is a state of mind, it’s not about what you have on. Sure… we all want to look our best and be relatively age appropriate, but that doesn’t mean there are any rules, just guidelines really. Consider this…
I have two beautiful sisters, one dresses in very youthful clothing, big jewelry, hair and makeup. She always has since her teen years.
The other sis dresses like she is old and tired and retired haha sorry Jes.
But they both have reasons for doing this, that I think are nuts, the one sis is so dreading getting old, She thinks the young looking clothes help…they don’t. Sorry sis.
My other sis so dreads looking tacky, aka (desperate)that she jumped off a frumpy cliff in the other direction. My advise, if anyone wants it…
Find a comfortable happy medium, with style. Be happy! don’t over think it…life is short. Just be you. Good luck to all.


5 Vinita

Amazing information. Thanks Sylvia. I’m straight or banana type with 41 inches bust 36 waist and 42 hip. I’m 5 feet 6 inches tall. Please suggest what kind of clothes should I wear. I’m 40 yrs old.


6 Sylvia

Hi Vinita, Check out my article on How to dress the rectangle body shape. That should get you started.


7 ruth ramos

Thank you so much for all this information. i need a wardrobe makeover and this has helped me a lot. I really appreciate it.


8 Sylvia

Thanks for your kind feedback Ruth!


9 Kim Steadman

These tips are very helpful. I am 44 years old and love love love fashion! i am constantly balancing my ever growing wardrobe to make my hubby happy (he likes jeans and a tight black t-shirt) and my love for trendy clothes along with my professional wardrobe. I realize that I can’t dress with the latest fads even though i would love to! I also love accessories and shoes but am realizing that I need to go with more lower heels now cuz my back can’t handle it anymore. I look forward to reading the rest of your blog.

Now onto finding what to wear for my body style… I am short (5’2″ and around a size 10 or 12P) and hourglass figure with a little of a tummy and bigger chest (36DDD).


10 Sylvia

Hi Kim, Glad that you enjoy my blog and find it helpful. For your body type you way want to have look at my article on how to dress when you are petite: I have yet to write an article about dressing for larger bust sizes, which I will do shortly.


11 Krista

I am 41 and I don’t feel like there are rules for dressing over a certain age, at least not yet 🙂 I think this post is PERFECT for most women.


12 Dee

I disagree – There are Rules for dressing you should follow when your over 40 – Im 46 – 5’10 1/2 and I find that if I wear certain clothes I can look like mutton dressed as lamb. I don’t wear mini skirts in public, I find myself dressing in black and nothing else. I have brought my FIRST EVER pair of fitted pants just below the knee. They look groovy with a my high heel ankle boot.

I would like to see more dressing for women who are tall.


13 Elaine

There are some women like myself who have good figures who are not fat nd have legs like a teenager through good diet and exercise so we can wear what we damn well please without looking like an old bag before your time. Black saps the hell out of your complexion by the way!


14 Elise

Umm, Elaine, do you know Dee or what kind of complexion she has? Perhaps black is not a good color for you, but it works for many women.
And the whole purpose of this webpage seems to be to help women not “look like old bags,” so you aren’t wrong there!


15 Jay

Thanks Dee! I was starting to shrink in my seat reading these comments. I am 48 and in fairly good shape, I do daily spinning classes and weight training a couple days out of the week. My husband loves the way I dress. I feel comfortable in anything as long as my boobs aren’t hanging out. Fitted dresses, skirts, skinny jeans, and high heels are a big part of my wardrobe. The only thing I don’t like is mini skirts, but that’s been all my life, just not something I’ve ever been comfortable in. Oh, and I am a makeup addict, nothing crazy but I do love taking care of my skin and makeup is always a must for me. I must say that I do get the evil looks from other women sometimes and it does make me question myself. But then I look in the mirror and I get over it. 🙂


16 Kami

Jay I echo your sentiments. I am 50 and I am the same. I also wear skirts about 4” above my knees. A nice short tweed skirt with oversized cashmere sweaters and long boots is one of my favorite outfit this fall. Of course to each is own. Of your are not comfortable or confident in a specific stile or clothing then do not wear it would be my advise. I still wear my over knee Stuart Weitzman Hiline boots tasteful and also own Burberry trench and my Chanel double flap., my wardrobe staples remain classic timeless with an edge. Embrace your confidence ladies and showcase that in your wardrobe ensemble. Cheers!


17 Nicole


I’m 44 years old. I am 5’4″ and 102lbs. My stats are 32-24-33. My thigh is 17″ in circumference without a scrap of cellulite. My inside leg is 31″.

I live in southern California where it is hot hot hot all the time. I LIVE in my booty shorts and after 3 kids I am proud of it. The rules are: there are no rules these days except 1 golden one: look at what you have, and DRESS TO SUIT IT.

Fitted pants below the knee look awful on me. I’m too short. Bet they look amazing on Dee though at 5’10”. I can only get away with a long skirt if it is A line – otherwise I look like a southern belle toilet paper holder. Low waist skinny jeans with a flowy top and some heels and the right jewelry make me feel a gajillion dollars. My only nod to my age – if I wear my booty shorts, my top is loose and doesn’t show too much skin. If I wear a tighter, more revealing top – I cover my legs more.

We women can do whatever we want these days – as long as we work with what we have and keep it classy.


18 Rachael


I think fashion can still be fun and many of these rules (I still wear shorts and cutoffs when I dress casually. I’m 46.) are old-fashioned. Never been one for tacky clothing (bejeweled words, overly ripped jeans).

Again, common sense reigns.


19 sam

Hello, I am 42 yrs old- can I wear cowboy boots with a dress, or is that too young?


20 Sylvia

Yes for sure. It’s not too young but I do think you need to be careful with styling them as they can have quite a wide fit over your calves which is not always a very flattering look.


21 Darcy

I’m 46 and I wear cowboy boots with dresses almost every weekend. Or even with a jean skirt. I even wear red boots, green boots and multi colored boots…I wish I could upload some pictures. I do not agree that a colored cowboy boot after 40 is a no.


22 Sylvia

As I mentioned Darcy, these ‘rules’ are not set in stone and really depend on each individual’s style. Clearly colored cowboy boots are a part of your unique style and I’m sure you look great in them. You are very welcome to upload photos to my Facebook page ( and I will share them with all followers. I would love to see you rocking those boots!


23 Karen

Hi Darcy,
I am 43 and have 2 pairs of western boots that I hardly ever wear. I’m afraid of looking like I’m dressing too young for my age and just haven’t figured it out yet, lol. I would love to see some photos of how you pair yours with dresses (or anything really).


24 Darcy Williams

Hi Karen,
Tag me in the FB group 40+Style Community and I’ll post pictures there.


25 Karen

Awesome – thanks! 🙂


26 Helen

If you like cowboy boots with a dress and you think they look good on, go ahead and wear them 🙂

I have 3 rules about dressing:

1-Do I like it?
2-Does it look good on me?
3- Is it appropriate for the occasion? ( eg, job interview, BBQ, wedding, funeral etc)

If the answer is yes to all of the above, then I go ahead and wear it, with pride!
The person who came up with archaic age appropriate rules should be praying to god that I never find him/her!


27 Sockpuppet

I abide by a few rules:
1) Wear trends/fads as accessories
2) Never too tight, too low or too much
3) Simple cuts and mostly solids
4) Don’t wear anything like a teenager or 20-something would
5) Hide your flaws, accentuate the positive


28 Sylvia

Some great rules!


29 Adel

Hi Ms. Sylvia,
Thank you for these very helpful advises on how wear clothes. I have just bought these long maxi dress (46 inches long) from the net, I am 5 ft (152 inches) only. Please give me advise on how to wear this. Thank you very much.


30 Sylvia

Hi Adel. This question is also addressed at this article on how to dress when you are petite For any further questions on how to dress it is best to ask them in the style forum


31 Lena Tilak

I am 42 yrs, I think I look like a barrel with 204 lb my burst 45, waist 43, hip49. I don’t know what to wear any more.


32 Sylvia

You can look good no matter what you body shape is Lena. Start with this article and find out your body type. Then follow some guidelines for your specific body type and start exploring!


33 Laura C.

I’m a rectangle so I looked at your suggested site Zara. Yuk! Most of those shirts and dresses look like G.C. Murphy and dime store (think Big Lots now) leftover rags from the 70s. Young models with bellies showing in short tops-cute for them but those items are not suitable for women over 40 even superfit women in shape. Get some real suggestions for us that will work so we don’t all go shopping and get something that “will do” but is not very attractive or flattering.


34 Sylvia

I offer suggestions all the time in close to 400 articles already on the site. Fashion changes all the time, so if Zara had good things one season, they may not do so necessarily the next. Also, Zara is a shop where you need to be picky. A lot of things are for very young women, but I still use it as a go-to shop for myself as there are always things that are good for us too. If you want to read more suggestions for the rectangle visit this page: I also have a page of other good shops for women over 40 here: If you want to understand why we can’t feature only 40+ women in fashion posts, you may want to read this article:


35 Robyn Kearns

I’m 46. 5’4″ and I weigh 150. People tell me I look young. Which is a good thing. 🙂 What is a proper dress length just for casual days? I am very classic as far as style goes. Thank you


36 Sylvia

I wrote an article about skirt lengths that would apply to dresses as well. Although I personally prefer on top or just under knees slightly higher will work too. It comes down to your personal preference. When I’m on the beach or holiday, I tend to go shorter with my dresses.


37 Helen

I don’t give a f@#! about rules, I am over 50, work out, and wear what ever i like that looks good on me and those who don’t like it can kiss my firm and mascular glutes!


38 Sylvia

By all means Helen. These ‘rules’ are only there for those that like some guidance. You will find that we break these ‘rules’ frequently here at 40+Style and have lots of fun with style and fashion!


39 Rebecca

Helen, I am not even sure why someone would take the time to read an d reply to the article if they did not care about what they wore.


40 RMG

I think the most essential thing is to count on the expertise of 20-something clerks in women’s clothing stores. If one of them tells you that a piece of clothing makes you look “young and hip”, you should definitely buy it.


41 Helen

I don’t count on the “expertise” of the 20 something or any other age sales assistant!
I look at three things:

1 – Do I like it?
2 -Does it look good on me?
3- Will it make the “age appropriate” dress police enraged?

If it ticks all 3 boxes, then, I will buy it! This woman is 76, looks great and wears staff that would make the age appropriate dress police froth in the mouth!!! She is my inspiration and I aim to be like her when I am that age!


42 Sylvia

wow, what an amazing woman! If you want to be like her though at that age, better start working out now…


43 Helen

I do work out, diligently, have been doing so for about 3-4 years, 5 times a week, weight training and bodyweight exercises, eat properly, I am 5.4, tall, weight 58 kg, wear size 6 US and have 18% body fat, which is regarded as lean.

My tummy is flat, I have visible triceps, quads and firm, rounded butt. I can bench press 40 kg for 10 reps, do about 30 push ups from toes, 12 parallel unassisted dips and 3 unassisted chin ups. In the fitness world my achievements are very modest/mediocre – nothing to crow about. However, how many 50 + women outside the fitness/gym environment to you know who train and perform like I do? Here’s my bench press video on FB: That’s 47kg for about 4 reps.

Back in 2010 my now ex husband has told me that I will quit in about 2 months! LOL


44 Sylvia

I’m impressed Helen. It looks like you are well on your way!


45 Helen

Thanks 🙂


46 Sylvia

Unfortunately not all shop assistants are experts though and many will say anything to sell an item. You will still need to trust your own judgement and go with your instinct.


47 Emla

If you have great legs, shorter length shorts are fine.


48 Marian Rothschild

Hi Sylvia,

Your readers are in good hands. It’s difficult to find style and fashion advice for women over 40 that I agree with 100%. As a certified personal image consultant and wardrobe stylist, most of my clients are women over 40 who ask similar questions as your readers. So glad they are getting terrific suggestions and pointers to express themselves by choosing styles that they love to give them pop and polish.

Best wishes for much success.
Marian Rothschild


49 Alyssa Porter

I totally agree!!! Im 42 going to be 43- I look good, especially for my age! who says disressed jeans or skinny jeans are for teens? Even the concert T shirts that are out are music from my generation lol and these kids are wearing them but if I wear one someone may say Im trying to hard to be young. Live life to the fullest… be yourself and wear what you want as long as it makes you happy. I am not ready to shop at coldwater creek


50 Martine

Sorry, But I love mom jeans. I grew up wearing low rise jeans. But I am very drawn to high rise jeans, especially vintage ones, like “mom ” jeans. I also like cut off shorts. And i like ripped denim. I love white button up shirts, and white t shirts. I have white t shirts in cotton, silk, and even soft leather. I like macthy match. Of course there was none of that when I was younger. But now at thirty, i want things to match. i LOVE wearing a top and skirt in the same pattern. So chic. Maybe I’m just not ready to grow up.


51 Sylvia

Good for you Martine! Ultimately you must do what makes you happy. Anything I say are just broad guidelines that you can choose to ignore.


52 Helen

Martine, you shouldn’t have to say sorry to anyone for wearing what you like, life is hard enough without the added stress of having the dress police on our backs!


53 Lesley

Great site and sound tips.


54 Deb

Sound advice! Thanks so much.


55 FashionistaOver40

I really hate it when someone decides that their fashion sense is “the only fashion sense”. Telling people over 40 they shouldn’t wear this or that… Just because you are old and maybe look old, doesn’t mean that all women over 40 appear old, wrinkly and have one foot in the grave. I don’t dress like a 20 year old but dress classy (my friends who are politicians, Dr’s and fashion designers…say so anyway) and am constantly asked my advice on fashion. I just tell people to wear what makes them happy. Most people don’t dress (in my circle anyway) like the “before” on makeover shows on tv, they dress like the “after”. If I want to wear a pair of ripped up jeans, I will. I have a great body, look in my 30’s (I’m not in my 30’s and haven’t been in more than a decade) and when people see photos of just my face, they are shocked that I am my age. I like to wear a more natural make up, my hair more simple and not colored. I am a vegan and take care of myself, don’t drink alcohol, don’t smoke, never did illegal drugs, exercise. SO my advice is that you can wear ripped up jeans if you want and the occasion warrants it (a rock concert maybe?) Maybe don’t wear them to the Opera lol. But it’s up to you to do what you want. People need to be themselves, not try to be what someone else teaches. I have read so many fashion magazines, blogs, watched tv shows, etc. They ALL give different advice on the exact same thing. Fashion isn’t a science, ladies. It is individual. Be yourselves. Who cares if someone else likes it or is jealous of it (of course when people tell me how they love the way that I dress, I do enjoy it). Live, Love, Laugh… and dress for your wants and needs!


56 Sylvia

I agree with a lot of what you are saying. And there are quite a few articles on this site that give exactly that message. We also sometimes have some lively discussions! Still, quite a few women like some guidelines and that is what I have given here in this article. Feel free to ignore them as you please. I wholeheartedly agree with your last sentence!


57 Michelle

I think this can apply to someone from late thirties and up. I see a lot of women around 39 that dress like teenagers.


58 Laura

So what if some women who are over 39 dress like teenagers? If they can pull it off then I say let them.


59 Sabina @Oceanblue Style

Dear Silvia, I also am not a type for guidelines and also dont think it has got anything to do with age at all. I personally feel that there is still a lot of tolerance missing in public opinion. But sharing ideas I find most inspiring. So I would really appreciate your input on my gray-in-gray with white blouse combination! Thank you. xo Sabina @Oceanblue Style


60 Sylvia

Lovely layering outfit Sabina and love the grays together!


61 Jayne

What a fantastic site! Thank you so much for the guidelines which are there for us to consider for our individuality and personal world. I appreciate it. I have found lately that I’ve got better at the science of working out lengths of tops and bottoms, which height of boot looks best with what and which length of necklace works. I too have been told I look a fair bit younger than my age (mid forties) but still work hard not to dress too young but classic with a hint of chic. I especially love leggings and will be very sad when/if they go out of fashion. Thanks again.


62 Sylvia

Thanks for your kind feedback Jayne. Enjoy browsing the site! 100s of articles for you to enjoy…


63 Sabina @Oceanblue Style

Oh I love wearing ripped jeans. And if you pair them with a nice classy sweater or coat it will totally created the best effect. xo Sabina @Oceanblue Style


64 Silvia DiPierdomenico

Sylvia’s guidelines are a great resource in an era when women are confronted by so many style options. Confronted by so much choice, it can be difficult to develop a unique personal style the way iconic women like Jackie Kennedy and Grace Kelly so convincingly did. But breaking the fashion rules is important because when a woman wears what’s unexpected she demonstrates a fearlessness that’s both empowering and engaging. She’s being true to her own unique style.

I recently wrote about this – Why Breaking the Fashion Rules Matters


65 Ellen

Hi, I am 45 years old and live in Phoenix where it is HOT for many months out of the year. I have always been a t shirt and shorts kind of person but now I feel very aware of how I look in those shorts (which isn’t terrible, just not like I was 25). What are your thoughts on shorts for the hot months and what length do you suggest? Thanks!!!


66 Sylvia

If you feel happy, beautiful and confident wearing shorts, wear them! You can pull off any look so long as you are confident about wearing it. However, if you start having doubts about any of these it will show. As for length it really depends on what you are wearing with the shorts. Creating a nice balance and silhouette is key here.


67 Ellen

Thanks so much Sylvia! I am pretty comfortable with shorts just above the knee. I just didn’t want to wear anything that made me look too much like my teenaged daughter or anything that is too old for me. I really appreciate your feedback and I love your website! The visuals are great for someone like me.


68 victoria

I’m nearly 41 and wear mainly skinny jeans and loose tops I’m 5’8 and a size 12uk would you say I’m too.old for skinny jeans?


69 Sylvia

I don’t think you are ever too old for skinny jeans!


70 Lisa

I wonder what Anna Wintour, Anna Dello Russo, Corine Roitfeld, and Donatella Versace would say about this list. They are all in their 50s and 60s and are all my style icons except for Donatella. Corine and ADR are the ones I emulate the most because we share the same fashion sense except my legs aren’t as thin as theirs, I don’t feel comfortable wearing short skirts and dresses, and up-to-there slits. Oh and sometimes ADR’s style leans towards the fantastical (she likes to make an entrance).


71 Sylvia

Bottom line is that we should all wear what makes us feel good and fabulous. That is the ultimate style rule!


72 Becky

Thank you so much! I recently lost 100+ pounds very quickly due to complications from an accident…and turned 55.

It’s been tough breaking out of the dark colors and shapeless/frumpy mindset. And, it will take some time and hard work to stop looking like a deflated Dr. Seuss character.

I’ve been concerned that the excitement of choosing new styles will seriously blur the line between tasteful and age-appropriate. I can’t begin to describe the difficulty finding sites that don’t cater to teeny-boppers; or for mature women that don’t place an emphasis on crisp and professional. I work as a writer for various charities in a home office. Of course, I want to look semi-polished. But, I have no need or desire to be fussy about my appearance every day.

The advice and pictures you’ve offered are infinitely helpful! Thank you again!


73 Sylvia

Thank you Becky. Great to hear that you are having fun with style again. There are more than 1000 articles on this site and many more pictures so I encourage you to browse the archives for lots more inspiration and tips!


74 archy

This tips am going to share with my mum…


75 kim

I’m 44 and love fashion, l tend to dress with a little edge , I have a pair of black over the knee boots that I absolutely love, I hope they are age appropriate.


76 Sylvia

If you feel fabulous and confident in them, then they are!


77 Lorriann lewis

Hi ladies. I’m a 52 year old woman stick in time. I tries to keep up with the trend but feel out of place. I don’t know where to start nor how to begin. Please help


78 Sylvia

Well there are now 1200+ articles on this site to help you on your way. You can start by visiting the start here tab at the left. However, the best and quickest way to really discover and jumpstart your style is my style course which you can find at


79 Jill

Hi could you tell me where I can find this fantastic long white sleevless shirt? It’s perfect!


80 Sylvia

The vest is from Stella Carakasi. You can find winter versions of this vest at


81 Susan

What about bikinis?

I’ll be 40 next year and I’m not ready to give up wearing bikinis just yet. I’ve still got my bikini body and since I’ve never had kids (and don’t intend to) I’ve never had stretch marks, etc.


82 Sylvia

I don’t see any reason to ever give up bikinis. I still wear them 🙂


83 Helene

Everytime I search for the right tunic to wear with leggings…it never seems to feel right on me. I feel like it’s too baggy or even cold feeling. I live in a ski mountain resort city and winters here are chilly. I love leggings though, because they are so warm…and tight tops don’t really go with them, but geez they do feel warmer than billowy baggy like tunics. I don’t know but I feel like I look like Ms. Potato Head when I wear these two combinations.. Ha Ha!


84 Sylvia

I have more tips for wearing leggings and some of my own examples at


85 Elise

My experience has been that women (well, men, too, but that is not the topic) either have a sense of what looks good on them or they don’t. They either have an “eye” or they don’t. I can’t tell you how many women I know who “think” they look fabulous, whereas my opinion is otherwise. And so many women take on trends just because they are trends, and do not take into consideration whether those trends are flattering on them!

I recommend to all women who are not confident in their own ability to choose what looks fabulous on them that they ask a friend or relative who always looks fabulous to act as their stylist. Of course educating oneself on what styles are most flattering on one’s body type is useful, but it is only in putting on different clothes and determining what works for one’s body that true discernment develops.

I also think it is funny when women say, “If you are over forty, you should not wear tight, ripped jeans, stilletos, too-tight plunging necklines, etc., etc., as if those looks are flattering on ANYBODY of any age! Ugly is ugly, unflattering is unflattering, and women of all ages and all body types make very wrong choices in an effort to be trendy.

In my opinion, classic, flattering clothing ALWAYS wins over unflattering trendiness, and a woman in unflattering clothing is never stylish. And of course women are absolutely free to wear whatever they like! But LIKING a look does not inherently endue upon it the title of “flattering,” nor does “trendiness” or “hipness” necessarily equal true style.


86 Sylvia

Yes it’s absolute true that some women have an innate sense of style while others don’t. But I disagree with you that style can’t be learned. I have seen amazing improvements from the women in my programmes. Of course improvement only comes through practise as you also mention which is why we do a lot of that in the privacy of our own community. The style club in combination is truly a great combination as it allows you to learn how to style yourself for your unique style and body type step by step, while at the same time getting immediate feedback from friends in the community. I talk more extensively about this topic at


87 lynetta

Why do I have to avoid ripped jeans if they are ripped in the right spots? LOL. I’m 40 but i don’t feel or look like it. I feel like a couple of rips on the knee isn’t so bad.


88 Sylvia

It’s only a guideline. If you love ripped jeans, go for it! Certainly now that ripped jeans are very much in style.


89 Kala

Thanks for your post.

I was wondering what you think about the “lace”, I personally love the lace.

What would be the guidelines to use for example a lace blouse?



90 Sylvia

yes lace can be fabulous. i personally feel that lace works best when the design is quite fine and intricate. Something like this blouse Of course you need to make sure that there is enough coverage underneath, preferably in the same color.


91 Laura

I am 48 years old and I personally disagree with several things in this article. Plus this article is only someone else’s opinion. Plus I am a non-conformist.

Some of us who are in their 40s do not look like we are in our 40s. I personally love to show off my belly. Plus I do not like wide legged jeans or flare jeans. I do not like anything that is baggy. I like tight straight legged jeans and there is nothing wrong with high waisted jeans depending on the brand and the cut. I still wear some designer jeans from the 80s and I still look hot in them.

And btw, can we please stop referring to high waisted jeans as “Mom Jeans”? I personally find that term offensive, degrading, and stereotypical. How about we just call them “jeans” or “high waisted jeans”? It just amazes me how society allows a Television Program like “Saturday Night Live” and the media to influence our fashion decisions.

My advice is to wear what you want to. Especially if you look good in it. Who cares what someone else thinks?


92 Susan

The “SNL” bit on “Mom Jeans” is hilarious.

I do on occasion like to show a little bit of belly when I’ out. I like to show off my belly at the gym and of course when I’m at the beach.


93 Rachael

Preach, sista! Love it.


94 Big fat pig

It seems like everyone commenting on this “Women over 40” website is skinny and using this forum to brag how awesome/hot they look. What about the woman in her early 50’s who is dealing with perimenopause and the accompanying 40 lbs that have settled mainly in my gut and is resistant to diet and exercise? I feel embarrassed to go out and only wear black when I do. The same outfit over and over, literally. I feel like a big fat pig, and would love any advice on how to dress at this weight/stage of life.


95 Sylvia

Actually we have lots of women with curves in this community. Most of my readers deal with bigger bellies and increased weight. You may find this article on that topic interesting. Wearing all black is not a good option though. You may feel that this hides your belly better but you end up looking drained and perhaps also insecure. It’s much better to play with color, texture and layers. You are still beautiful so it’s also really important not to use those awful words you used to describe yourself. You can be bigger and gorgeous and if you learn how to dress for your new body and show confidence, you will be just as beautiful as before. You may like to join my free Find Your Style challenge to get started with your style journey.



do the same rules apply to 50+ women too?


97 Sylvia

Please note these are not ‘rules’, just guidelines. Yes these are good for all women over 40 🙂


98 Nicole P

Hello, I was just wondering what your thoughts on dressing closer to the age I actually look? I’m about to turn 40 and most people think I’m early 30’s. One thing I do know is I love my jeans and band t-shirts and will very likely keep those around to wear sometimes til I die, haha


99 Sylvia

You have to dress for what makes YOU happy There is no need to ditch the jeans and t-shirts at any age. Always stay true to who you are and you can wear anything.


100 Jey

Why do these posts seem to automatically assume that if you’re over 40 you are heavy set or have bulges?
Anyway, I’m 43, but I look quite young and have yet to get wrinkles or grey hair. I’m thin and fit and my problem is that people guess my age as young as early to mid 20’s. This kinda stinks because men my age view me as too young for them. I dress classy and fashionable, but I want to look closer to my age! I don’t know what to do! I’m so frustrated!


101 Sylvia

I’m not assuming anything as I write articles for women of all shapes and sizes. I just know that it’s a reality for a majority of my readers so I’m also speaking to them. An unusual problem to have as I usually hear the opposite (as men often prefer younger women). What I can suggest though is to opt for more classic clothes. These will usually lead you to appear older.


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