The importance of feeling confident on the inside (and not just the outside)

This website has always been about feeling confident.

When I set out to create 40+style I really wanted to convey to women that there is no ‘used by’ date for beauty and style and confidence.

That, in fact, our confidence increases as we age.

How a pretty picture helps with feeling confident

The majority of the articles here on 40+style still focus on outward confidence, but more and more I’ve come to realize that true confidence comes from the inside out.

I recorded this podcast about it: how to get confident with your appearance.

It’s easier to feel confident about ourself if the outward picture is cute to look at. When you look good, it feels easier to feel good.

That’s why I feel there’s nothing wrong by dressing ourself in such a way, that the things we love about ourself are highlighted while other parts are downplayed. Who doesn’t want to feel better about the themselves?

A pretty picture is not a requirement for feeling confident

But a pretty outward appearance shouldn’t be a requirement. Women certainly shouldn’t feel like they ‘have to’ put makeup on before they step outside.

it worries me a bit when I hear women say, that they don’t dare to step outside without makeup on. Why not? Why can’t we just be fully ourselves and not feel fully confident?

I feel that it’s partly because we have been conditioned that as women we need to look the part. That we need to look pretty to be accepted.

Our society as a whole still has a strong preference for the young and beautiful and we are often made to believe that we need to look younger and prettier to function well or be taken seriously by our bosses. 

So many of these ‘rules’ have become so ingrained in society and our brains that we actually start to believe them.

In fact you’re beautiful and amazing just as you are!

True beauty, strength and the ability to function well doesn’t come from outward appearance.

It comes from within us.

It comes from a belief in yourself and a deep knowing that you are beautiful. It comes from true self confidence.

How is it possible that so many women over 40 feel happier with their body in their 40s and 50s than they were in their teens even though they are bigger with more lumps and bumps?

That’s because they have come to accept themselves as they are. It’s because their thoughts about their body has changed. It has nothing to do with the shape or size of their body.

They have come to realize that the shape or size of our body doesn’t mean anything about us deep inside or our self worth. That a body size doesn’t define beauty or confidence.

Why do so many women still believe otherwise?

Unfortunately there are still so many women who continue to struggle with poor body image or other confidence issues.

That needs to stop.

Because low self esteem and a lack of confidence in yourself, either caused by poor body image or other issues, is hurting your happiness and opportunities in every other part of your life too.

Low self confidence keeps you stuck

I have found that low self confidence is the main reason so many women get stuck in life.

When you don’t feel confident, you’re not showing up in the best way you can.

You don’t feel confident enough to pursue your goals.

You don’t feel that you can become a stylish woman.

You don’t feel like you can change career, pursue a new relationship, start a new hobby or even start a business.

And rather than solving some of the underlying issues, you find yourself buffering with food or alcohol just to feel better.

The truth is: self confidence is something you can actively work on

I’ve made it my mission to help women cultivate confidence from the inside out.

Self confidence is not something you were born with and it’s not something that you either have or don’t have. It’s something you can actively work on. 

It’s not a character trait either and being introverted or extraverted has nothing to do with how confident you can become. 

My 21 steps course already covers everything you need to know to feel confident from the outside. My new program will teach you how to cultivate true confidence from the inside.

I’ve studied this topic in depth over the last few years and have become a certified life coach.

Through my study and experience in working with women on their confidence, I’ve identified that there are 4 key steps that will lead to true self confidence. 

The ABLE self confidence formula

The Self Confidence Formula is my unique process for cultivating true self confidence.

Once you master these 4 steps, you will be able to cultivate self confidence on a continuous basis. 

You’ll be able to accept yourself just as you are and will not let anything get in the way from leading your best life.

Cultivating confidence is a practice

Of course, you’ll not be able to build true self confidence overnight, and that’s why I’m using the word CULTIVATE. The confidence formula is a process you repeat frequently to build this confidence for yourself.

And once you have true self confidence, you know that you can go after whatever it is that you want to do.

That is what I want for you and all the women who read my articles. We need more truly confident women, who own their beauty and power and who can enrich the world with all the gifts they have to give.

On a scale from 1 to 10, how confident are you?

My Mission this year is that I want to help at least 1000 women feel more confident. On a scale from 1 to 10 I want to help you move your confidence from a 5 or below to at least an 8 or above.

Want to find out more, check out the details.

Don’t forget to tell me in a comment below where you find yourself on the confidence scale. I’d love to hear from you.

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