Perhaps you have been following this site for a while. You have done the style course, read lots of articles on how to dress after 40 and have updated your wardrobe with a few current items. You are looking absolutely fabulous!
But then you go out in your fabulous clothes with either your husband or boy friend and let’s just say that his attire does not quite live up to your expectations. He has not discovered the male equivalent of 40PlusStyle just yet or even worse he would never read it if he did. In fact he does not particularly care about his appearance or the way he looks.
If that describes the man in your life, then here are some tips on how to get your man to dress better.
1. Plan a ‘date’ for shopping
Rather than going to a movie, go shopping for a few hours. Tell him how happy that would make you. This tactic may work even better if you have done some pre-shopping and know exactly where the good stuff is. You may only have 1-3 hours, so it’s best to use that time very efficiently.
2. Buy clothes for him, either as presents or just because ‘you were in the city anyway’
If he does not want to go shopping, there is no reason you should not. Get a tape measure out and get his measurements and sizes and go shopping at those shops that allow returns. Find a moment when he is most relaxed to get him to (at least) try the clothes.
When shopping for your husband, keep the following things in mind:
- Buy things that match his style and personality. Even though it may be a lot less hip than you would desire, there is no point buying things that he does not feel comfortable with.
- Check with him what his favorite clothes are and if those are getting old, find some good replacements.
- Concentrate on quality rather than quantity. Men look much better in high quality clothes and you don’t want to make too many shopping trips for him.
- Make sure to buy items in color. Men need more color in their wardrobe too!
3. Give lots of compliments when he wears something nice and encourage him to buy more of the same
You never know, the penny may suddenly drop…
4. Alert him to clothes that do not fit, and (gently) suggest that they need to be brought to a tailor.
When clothes don’t fit well your man will never look good.
5. Make sure he owns a few good basics. Things to look out for are:
- High quality polo shirts in his best colors
- Good quality cotton pants
- A few well fitted shirts
- Cashmere sweaters for winter
- A nice casual jacket
- Good quality leather shoes like brogues
- Socks that match his pants and shoes
6. Lead by example
If you look nice for him and make an effort, he may want to do the same for you. If you like him to do a closet clean do it yourself and tell him that you will take a pile to Goodwill soon. Does he want to add anything from his closet?
7. Lay out his clothes for him
I know that there are lots of women who do this. It sure may be a fool proof way to get your man to dress better if your man lets you, but this option is high maintenance for sure!
8. Educate him
Perhaps he is interested in looking good, but just has no idea how to do it. In that case you can be his educator or you can direct him to sites like RealMenRealStyle where Antonio provides lots of great style advice for men or personal male style bloggers like Terry for inspiration.
Good luck in your quest and please let me know, how have you been able to get your man to dress better?
Want to get more articles from 40+style in your inbox, subscribe here.
You can also connect with 40+style on Facebook, Instagram or Pinterest.
Support 40+style by using the links in our articles to shop. As an associate for Amazon and many other brands, we receive a small commission (at no cost to you) on qualifying purchases which enables us to keep creating amazing free content for you. Thanks!
This is a crock. For 15 years I’ve carried out all of the above tips and not once has my husband actually taken to any of them. I’ve even tried talking about it. He wants to wear the same, one in 30 he has, of the exact same under t shirt & same exact jeans every…… single…… day….. for…..15……. long years. And btw, he’s gorgeous. But he won’t budge on his apparel. New stuff just sits and collect dust. Going out? Same tshirt & jeans. Try giving some tips on real life stubborn men. I’d love to hear what ya got.
I feel your pain Celeste….Some men are very stubborn in this regard and quite frankly I don’t have the answer to this either..
I feel your pain Celeste… And I honestly don’t have the answer to this one….
Oh, it’s really interesting!
By the way I have a question about online (as well as mobile and instagram) shopping for the husband. Could you share any special secrets, how to buy online and be sure about quality and sizes? What was your worst experience and how hard was it for you to cope with that?
I don’t have any special secrets I’m afraid. Just always make sure that you check the fabric details and that you shop from a reputable store. I added some of my favorite stores here: https://40plusstyle.com/best-online-shops/ I have had no terrible experiences….
I think my husband is beyond help. He is not at all fashionable, and yet he’s incredibly picky about his clothes. 99% (literally) of the things I buy for him are returned. I almost never buy him clothes anymore. With a personal stylist for a wife, one might think he’d reconsider, but no such luck. I’ll keep trying, but he’s a great man, so I’ll pick my battles.
I know what you mean! That’s why I find it almost impossible to buy him things..
good overarching suggestions. i’m fortunate – my sweet hubby of 12 yrs has always been open to my input. he kind of thinks of me as his personal stylist. he dressed in nice clothes when we first met, but sort of conservative, corporate frumpy, if you can visualize that for a man. now he’s shifted to well-fitted modern classics with trendy accents and even has a signature color (purple) with items like a textured orchid dress shirt and plum Swarovski watch to express himself. he’s also found an affinity for pink shirts and pocket squares, and we update his casual wear every few years. he’s game to try just about anything i bring home (which i can return later if needed). i have to give him credit – he has good taste and cares about his appearance. he always looks dashing. i’m one lucky duck!
you aure are Claire!
i am lucky to have a BF who’s into dressing nicely. I showed him the brands, cuts, fabric, and where to look and he just took off running. He’s much much improved from the typical dad looking get-up to hipster-ish and finding his own style.
the BF before him was a total 180. he never wanted to hear my input and insisted on his own aesthetic vision. There’s nothing majorly wrong with his but it was narrow. I wished that he’d at least try (not to buy) some of my ideas.
when it comes to influence men’s style, i don’t hold up hope. they are as stubborn as can be about their wardrobe. to change that is to invite argument and bitterness. at the end, we all have to decide what’s more important: favorable fashion style or a compatible lifestyle/personality. I’d go for the latter any old day.
Men are stubborn indeed! And I agree with you that personality is way more important than dress sense. Still, it would be nice to have both 🙂
I’m kinda with Marla (and I’m a guy). Why throw away money when you can use the money to buy more girl clothes? lol. I’m not a fashion icon by any means but do we really need advice about socks? Are we that bad? Personally I would be offended if my wife laid out a daily wardrobe for me, altho I appreciate her comments on whatever I do wear when I have to get dressed up (not too often).
Also I CANNOT shop for three hours! One would be the max for me. Plus, I don’t shop, I buy stuff. I decide what I need in advance and then I go and find it. Into one store, no got? Outta there and on to the next store. Bing bang boom. No eye-glazing hours wandering the mall for me.
Of course my presence here would indicate I’m not quite a typical guy, altho my men’s clothing sense is pretty close.
Sylvia, your list of the above advice is perfect, wish it would be effective on our men, haha. I have found that compliments work as well as laying out the clothing (sometimes). I purchased a wonderful pair of linen trousers and shirt for the hubby for our last trip to Italy only to find him dressed (in this incredible outfit) with his Nike shoes, seriously? And, he insisted it was just fine. I so wanted to head to the nearest Italian shoe store and buy a pair of wonderful loafers but he just said over and over again, “it’s just not my style.”
I have totally given up on converting my husband’s regard for fashion and it’s importance. He is a total minimalist. Doesn’t think clothes are important and only shops when absolutely necessary. He may have the right idea. I know he has saved a fortune by not wasting money on clothes.
Mr C is the rare species of man who loves shopping and always buys clothes by himself. He listens to my advice but knows his style and what he wants (or doesn’t want). I have learned that complimenting is the far better strategy for every man.
He is not German but in general German men dress terribly boring or without style.
Annette
Lady of Style
Just like most Dutch men. You can pick them out in an instant at the airport. They are the ones that send you to sleep by just looking at them. LOL
My husband does have an interest in clothes. Unfortunately also in food and drink. I did get him to adjust his style a little to his new shape, but he is still convinced he is going to lose weight. We are in anticipation. And I have tried most of your advice, but he has a mind of his own. Very much so. Does not want interfererence from me.
Greetje, our husband’s cold be good friends also. I. too, have tried all the above and he still has that ‘mind of his own’. Oh well, at least they appreciate their women looking nice, right?
Forgot to say that it really helps when his guy friends compliment him and the women as well!
I try to stretch my husband’s style as much as possible and buy him things to try all the time. About 75% of the time he keeps them. i have really expanded his colors and introduced him to cardigans that he now loves… Slim cut pants are also thanks to me! I do respect it when he really doesn’t like things and just take them back… We have talked about starting to take some of the shirts he wears untucked to the tailor to shorten the length. I know that if we just go once, he will become a huge fan of tailoring as he has been with the slim cut shirts and pants. Looking forward to this soon!